Davins Comedy Blog

Please By My House - By Joe Currie (Davin's Den)



It is now March and my house has been on the market since June of last year and I am at the end of my rope.

Since February of last year when I got separated, my main goal to get the house sold and from last year February until June I had worked tirelessly to prepare the house for sale and in June we put it up for sale.

Since I realized my marriage was over five years ago I was told that every next step to be taken would have to involve me which I have taken with some of these steps being rough and emotional. 
The one major step would be a buyer for the house, which is the most major step and the one that is out of my control.

If my Wife and I were still happily married it would not be that big of a deal, but we are separated and still living under the same roof living separate lives. It’s odd that the person who was the center of your life you barely know now and the reality will continue until the house is sold.

I heard if you buried a statue of St. Joseph it would help you sell the house quicker and everybody has their opinion on how to bury him.  I have tried every which way and no luck. I have not given up the faith and maybe if I stopped calling him St. Francis maybe he would help.

We did have people that were interested such as a home for the disabled, who strung us along for three months before they walked away a day before we were to go to contract, Bullshit, but at least I have a joke about disabled people walking away.

We had one person who wanted to buy the house and then wanted to knock it down. People asked me if I would be upset and I told them I would be the first person on the bulldozer when the check cleared.

We have had people that were scheduled to look at the house and never came. Do you know how frustrating it is to be at the library a mile from your own home sitting there while you are waiting for somebody that’s never coming?

Then there is having an open house and having no one show up, which my real estate agent says is because the taxes may be too high and maybe they should have been grieved, great, would have been good advice back in June.

It is very frustrating trying to move on with your life when you feel it’s stalled and the keys to it moving are from somebody you don’t even know yet. But with this everything else is going okay from the radio show, my two bands, and my comedy. I then look at people I know going through far worse things as battling a disease, being out of work, or losing a loved one, and I realize my situation as dire as it is, is a lot less worse than what other folks are going through. 

So if you if you are looking for a nice four bedroom home in a nice area please buy my house.
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