The Republican Comedy Debate / Campaign Stop – by Davin’s Den

In lieu of the reason shift towards comedy style debates and stump speeches instead of politics the Davin’s Den crew came up with how and what this experience should be.

In lieu of recent racial tensions at some campaign stops they should add an urban stump speech so black people know which campaign stops are meant for them.
They hire street teams who promise the folks they will see Bush, Cheney, Powell, and the reanimated corpse of Reagan only to be shown this current crop of candidates.
They enforce a two drink minimum to ensure that we are lubricated enough not to question anything they say.
They have a sign where you walk in warning the people that they may hear offensive language and uncomfortable topics and that the opinions do not represent the venue but only the person saying it. And then add in parenthesis the person saying it may eventually say he never said it and does not mean it anyway.
Every issue compared as if it was on acid, Trump’s health care bill would be like Obama care on acid.
Both Rubio and Cruz are called hacks
They all complain Amy Schumer stole their platform.
They all call BS on Trump’s credits
Bush dropped out because he couldn’t bring 10 people
They feel Ben Carson would do better if he was on Urban night.
When they go over the bell they are called city politicians.
Before each campaign stop they have somebody on a loud speaker ask the audience to keep their protests to a minimum and their laughter to a maximum.
Every campaign stop asks if anybody is celebrating anything like a birthday, anniversary, Martin Luther King Day.
Each of them say let’s give it up for the troops before they talk about Iraq
Joe Biden can come up and do a guest spot
Trump has caught on by having Chris Christie warm up the crowd with some humor. All politicians follow suit. Jeb, Lindsay, & Carlie are ready and willing.
They put John Kasich in the check spot
Trump opens his segment with “ I know what you are Thinking”  why is a wolverine sleeping on my head.
Every candidate closes by having an audience member or Megyn Kelly come up from the audience and act as their arms as they act out how they will repeal Obama care, cut taxes, build a wall, or bomb ISIS.
Down side is all the candidates are on tv constantly and as all comedians know once it is on tv the material is burned.  Unfortunately, the candidates do not know this and are boring us with the same jokes.
Good news is comedians should be expected by politicians to replace speech writers with joke writers.
Bad news is comics may start getting bumped at clubs when Trump has a new 5 minutes he wants to work on.
Bad news is comics will start getting bumped from week long comedy clubs because the losing candidate will hit the road as a touring comedian and will have a ton of TV credits like CSPAN, Meet the Press, Fox Business Channel.
Here is the link to hear how it sounded on the radio!   

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